Caring about what others think…

While we are wired to care what other people think, there is a tendency for it to become extreme, and take you over.

Caring about other people's opinions helps us feel safe, and that we belong. That's a good feeling and we don't want to risk jeopardizing it. In our culture, weight carries stigma and increases the risk that we will be thought of as less valuable.

For people in larger bodies, this discrimination can become a social, professional, and medical barrier. This is a foundational layer of fear for many people and I do not mean to underestimate it here.

But there is another layer usually going on, a more personal layer, that wants to present in a certain way because we are used to seeking validation and approval from everyone except ourselves.

The people pleasing layer.

As a society, we care way too much about other's experiences of us and not enough about our own. It breeds competition, comparison, low self-esteem, and burnout. We are constantly performing for others instead of living in alignment with our own values.

When we choose to value our appearance over our own well-being -- that's people pleasing.

What would change if you started living your life for you?