Why do I binge when I’m happy?
Over the course of my binge eating career (honestly, a career is exactly what it felt like), I explored every possible association between my need for food and negative emotions, but could not understand why I ate when I was happy.
I’d come home from a party — and binge.
I’d get good news — and binge.
I’d accomplish a task — and binge.
It made no sense.
Or, it seemed to make no sense.
Through my education and introspection, I’ve come to realize why this was happening. Here, I outline some of the primary reasons that we binge eat in response to “positive” emotions, too:
Emotional Regulation.
Emotions are energy. When we feel any emotion in a large burst--even positive emotions like excitement, relief, or happiness (ie. you just got really good news, you just finished a huge project, you just found out you're pregnant, etc) --it's still energy. It leads to a heightened state of arousal, and even though it's coming from a positive place, it needs direction. If you aren't used to emotional expression, you might use the rythmic, sensory experience of food to down regulate.
Discomfort with Comfort.
Sometimes happiness feels threatening. If you're feeling good, there's only one way to go from there. It can feel easier to stay in a "negative" emotion than to experience a "positive" one and risk losing it. This line of thinking is consistent with those who live in extremes or have trouble seeing gray areas. An eating response can be a way of getting back to a state that feels familiar and won't abandon you.
Self-Protection.
Sometimes we don't give full credit to what our eating patterns are actually doing for us. It's easy to think you want stop eating, but what if it's protecting you from something? For example, some people use food as a way to avoid letting others in, ward off future failure, or keep strong emotions at bay. If you stop your patterns, what will protect you from these things? Cue food, which will keep you stuck with conscious frustration but may help you feel safe from those subconscious fears.
Habitual Reward.
If you grew up with food as a reward system, or if you are so used to restricting that food feels like something that you have to "earn," then happiness might habitually nudge you use this opportunity to celebrate, reward, or indulge. This doesn't have to be a problem, but pay attention to your underlying beliefs about earning food. When food is a neutral experience, it doesn't have to be saved for special occasions.
Do any of these concepts resonate with you?
You can explore these (and other) associations between your binge eating and your emotions in my 1:1 coaching programs and my 12-week binge eating recovery program, available here.
